Surviving the Long Distance Romance

In the long run, distance doesn’t matter.

You long for love. You want a relationship. You want to experience what every other couple is experiencing; that perceived bliss of being in love, of having the opportunity of doing things together. Then the universe answers your prayers and you may just find yourself in a long distance relationship.  Suddenly, you don’t know how to make it work for long distance relationships come with a much greater struggle. You both find that there is not enough time. You misjudge each other’s reactions simply because you might not have the feel of what the other is truly like because you were never able to bask in each other’s presence. You might have found love across oceans, like I did. Believe me when I say it is tough. However, once you find that person which you have an unwavering connection to, what’s tough would seem easy. 

Here are some tips I can suggest to making your relationship work:

• Communicate, communicate, communicate! There is no other way. Communication is so essential to a long distance relationship. It does not mean you relay every single thing you did/do to the other person, but you do relay issues – what’s bothering you. The little things that made your day joyful. Your concerns. You have to let the other into your life and don’t hold anything back. 
• Set a time: plan ahead, get into routine that you will talk at a certain time. 
• Be understanding that you both still have lives to live, for we are called to duty regarding our many different roles. So be welcome to understanding that if a call is missed, or if something comes up, there must be available flexibility. It’s okay to not be able to talk for one day or night. It’s okay if you’re tired and need rest. 
• You simply won’t have things to talk about everyday. You’re humans. After texting all day, you might have nothing at all to talk about when you get on a call. That is perfectly okay. In love, you simply understand such things. It doesn’t mean the love has dimmed at all. 
• Lower your guard: you don’t have to do this completely, but lower it enough. Allow them to have a taste of your sensuality.
• Appreciate them: tell them how much they mean to you and how grateful you are to have them in your life. 
• Take the quiet time as time to reflect and appreciate all that the relationship is bringing to you. 
• Keep social media out of your relationship. There must be a line which must be drawn. 
• If you must, then set boundaries with each other. Keep track of and observe what the other expects of you, and if you can’t live up to it, then make it clear. Once that person truly loves you, it shouldn’t really matter. 
• Don’t run from fights, embrace them. But, love each other afterwards. Sometimes, you say things you don’t mean in the moment. 
• Put efforts into setting plans in place to visit each other. It is absolutely important for a healthy relationship.
• It is absolutely important to let your family know about it. The right person will bring forth the courage you need to face them, because you are willing to fight for them. Everyday. Anyday.
• Be a team and always listen. 

All the best. I hope this helps. Lots and lots of love.

∼ Soshinie A. Singh